Our Catholic Courtship (Click here to start!)

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You can find more detailed posts about our courtship journey here 🙂 Below is an overview!

On the feast of the Nativity of the Blessed Virgin in 2017, The Dash (after having taken my dad out to dinner and receiving permission) came to my family’s house, totally surprising me with his presence, as well as with lilies and a rose . . . and he asked if I would do him the honor of courting him.

We’d met only a few months beforehand. After hitting it off really well, we spent the ensuing summer getting to know one another through emails and occasional visits. It was increasingly friendly as we discovered all the things we had in common and the ways we complemented, but it was still emotionally guarded.

The Dash had never been in an exclusive relationship before (in my mind, a complete miracle!). Prior to meeting him, I’d been in a long-distance relationship for nearly two years, one that had had its own blessings but wasn’t meant to end in marriage. It certainly wasn’t a typical dating relationship, and in many ways was a courtship, but afterwards, I was left convinced that I needed to re-learn, or even just discover, what courtship really was.

In summary, The Dash and I both were approaching this potential relationship with a desire to figure out what we were actually doing!

We’d both grown up in families who fostered a desire for more than the dating norm. On a personal level, I was familiar with “courtship” almost exclusively thanks to the famous Bates and Duggar families, who saved their first kisses and had chaperones: it was a great place to start, but since mine and their families’ viewpoints weren’t united in the Catholic Faith, I knew there had to be some fundamental differences between Protestant and Catholic courtships. Only, what were they?

The Dash asked me to court him on September 8th. September 9th, while we were in his car (with my sister in the backseat), we had our first-ever discussion as a courting couple. We really only knew four bare essentials.

1.) We knew we were attracted to one another on all the healthy, normal levels.

2.) We knew we wanted to discern God’s Will specifically in regards to whether or not we should be married.

3.) We knew we wanted to stay pure.

4.) We knew we didn’t want to “date” in the typical sense.

And thus we began a gradual journey of figuring out the dynamic of our new courtship.

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